the truth ....

not my original story

I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so much. The whole Venus and Mars thing. Why men think with their head and women with their heart.

FOR EXAMPLE:

One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed.Well,
the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says "I don't feel like
it, I just want you to hold me."

I said "WHAT????!!! What was that?!"

So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear...

"You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me
to satisfy your physical needs as a man."

She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me for who
I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?"

Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.

The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with
her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big
unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on
several different very expensive outfits.

She couldn't decide which one to take so I told her we'll just buy them
all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said lets get
a pair for each outfit. We went onto the jewellery department where she
picked out a pair of diamond earrings.

Let me tell you...she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave
short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she
asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis.

I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's fine, honey."

She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement.
Smiling with excited anticipation she finally said, "I think this is all
dear, let's go to the cashier." I could hardly contain myself when I blurted
out, "No honey, I don't feel like it."

Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled
"WHAT???!!!" I then said, "Really honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff
for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man
enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman." And just when she
had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, "Why can't you just
love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?"

Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either.

Ha! Why did you post this story?! It was really weird.

Lol'd at the last bit.

Yeah. It was funny. Not exactly appropriate but really funny.

I'm still laughing :]

I'm not. It was funny, but not that funny.

ooo the irony!
lol i love stories with a twist, and sorry that it was borderline inapropreate

on facebook i have this posted as...'A Funny story for the Guys'

not all grlz have shopping needs... except for me, a cd store or hot topic store, and a big wad of cash. other than that.... i dont really have shopping needs...

weird story

not that wierd, its called revenge/ha in your face-ness

I hate shopping period. I would dump a guy just for trying to get me to shop.