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 The dark side chapter one

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Alyssa
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PostSubject: The dark side chapter one   Wed Dec 31, 2008 8:07 pm

After the prolouge the story starts off kind of slow but it will get better and have more action.

Chapter One: The rider

He was riding his horse through the woods. I couldn’t make out his face. All I saw was his hood. The cloak was all black. The woods were dark and creepy. It was full of weird noises. Howling and rustling. He stopped and pulled off his hood. He was the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen. He was a centaur, a man and a horse mixed together. He had black long hair and his skin was a deep tan color. You could see it glow from the other side of the woods.

A small bearded man came out of the bushes. A dwarf. He was very small. His white beard covered his whole body.

“Hello, Samus,” said the dwarf. “I have been waiting for hours where have you been?” Samus held out a small jewel. A blue topaz.

“I am sorry Kaseus,” said Samus. “Can you forgive me.” The dwarf had to look up to see Samus’ face.

“Do you have the magical jewel?” asked Kaseus. Samus handed the Topaz to Kaseus. But then I saw a bright light. The sun.

I had woken up from my dream. I sat up in the old, soft, mattress made out of feathers from geese.

“SAPPHIRE!” The servant Maysa screamed. “GET UP!” I hated when she screamed. Her small British voice plus a high pitched squeal were not equals.

“Yes, Maysa,” I said and crawled out of bed. When I got to the palace lobby i saw Mattiss withan open door.

“Hello, my daughter,” said Mattiss. “Are you ready to go into the forest for the first time?”

“For what?” I asked. I was confused. Mattiss never let me into the woods behind the palace.


“When you take my place as queen you will fight in a battle against the good,” explained Mattiss. I was starting to like the idea of being a queen.

We rode to the forest and it looked just like my dream. Dark and creepy. Then I saw him. Samus. Just like in my dream. He was still a centaur in reality.

"Do you see that centaur?" asked Mattiss. "You need to slay him and bring me back the jewel." Slaying Samus really didn't look like an easy job. It looked hard. Really difficult. I saw that I had to watch out for all four of his legs. Pay attention to whatever he was carrying in his sack slung around his shoulder. And many more things.

"Do you understand, Sapphire?" asked Mattiss.

"Yes, father," I said glumly, knowing I was going to fail.


Last edited by alyrox2009 on Thu Jan 01, 2009 10:23 am; edited 2 times in total
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Ekat
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PostSubject: Re: The dark side chapter one   Wed Dec 31, 2008 8:16 pm

Kinda too little. Very little. Edit your post and write more in my opinion.

How many chapters would there be?
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